I'm taking the advice recently given by Jeanine and just writing. That's my disclaimer for this post.
I've been musing (can I say that?) about how interesting people are and especially my view of them. I find myself forming opinions of people rather quickly. And then I seem to change my opinions just as quickly once I get to know them. I think my opinions are often based on superficial things such as:
the way people look (pretty, plain, black, white, foreign, male, female, long hair, short hair, dyed hair, red hair, happy, depressed, shy)
what people wear (tight clothes, baggy clothes, trendy clothes, unflattering clothes, chic clothes, sporty clothes, body piercings, tattoos, makeup, jewelry, flip-flops, high-heels, skater shoes)
what comes out of their mouths ("hi", laughter, cuss words, complaints, high voice, sweet voice, loud voice)
and what I see people doing (talking, hugging, flirting, pondering, studying, practicing, reading, smoking, drinking, fellowshipping, smiling, frowning).
I think there's more to people than all that. I know as a missionary I felt like I truly saw people, but I sometimes forget. I know I don't want people to judge me based solely on these things. When I'm sick and grumpy, I hope people know that I'm just sick and grumpy. When I'm complaining or criticizing, I want them to know that in my heart I really love people and I often express more than I feel. In other words, I want people to give me the benefit of the doubt, but do I reciprocate?
People are amazing! Every once in a while I catch a glimpse of the divinity that is in all people. We all have different backgrounds, values, strengths and weaknesses. But I'm realizing more and more that despite our differences, there is good to be seen in everyone and we can learn from everyone around us. For instance, here at NOI (National Orchestral Institute):
there's Margo, my roommate--plays cello; strong family values; going to teach in New York; has a beautiful smile; kind to everyone.
there's Nick, the concertmaster--from Pennsylvania; introduced himself to me when I was being shy; always looks happy; seems to be friends with everyone.
there's Hyun Ji--a cellist from Korea; always asks how I'm doing and tells me I look pretty; turns out she's married and has a little son.
there's Kate--plays bass; always has a fun time; smiles at me from across the orchestra.
there's . . . a million more people. Each with their own story, their own set of details, things that I'll never know, no matter how hard I try to get to know them. And they each have potential that I can't even begin to comprehend. How can I get offended if they say something mean? How can I criticize them if they do something different than I would? How can I help but love them?
There's a quote (a very fragmented quote--I apologize) from C.S. Lewis that I love. "He said (in the Bible) that we were ‘gods’ and He is going to make good His words. If we let Him . . . He will make the feeblest and filthiest of us into a god or goddess, dazzling, radiant, immortal creature, . . . a bright stainless mirror which reflects back to God perfectly . . . His own boundless power and delight and goodness."
Even as I've had these profound realizations about people, I find myself still judging them, criticizing them, being offended by them. But I don't want to! I want to live by the admonition found in 1 John 4:7&12: "Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of god . . . If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us."
That's what it's really all about, isn't it?
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5 comments:
My sentiments exactly! We just watched Evan Almighty...not only is it clean and hilarious-it has themes that run through it that are very similar to this post. Thanks for writing your thoughts so well. (mostly so I don't have to).
Lovely post, Heather. I agree -- people are amazing, and we're all more alike that I think most of us initially think. That was one of the biggest lessons I learned when I moved away from Provo - the place where everyone I knew shared my basic religious beliefs - to Indiana - the place where they pretty much didn't. But even though at the on-set I felt so different and apart from my new neighbors, I pretty quickly learned that we were more alike than different. And that was a pleasant thought.
Wow, quite profound Heath. I am impressed and everything you say is true. Sadly we all seem to fall into the same situation of critizing people before we even get to know them. Like they always say it's hard to make a good first impression. It wouldn't be so hard if we weren't soo quick to judge others and actually give them a chance to show us who they really are. Now you have really got me thinking. I guess these are all things that we all need to consider and think about and especially we need to learn to love all no matter what they look like, say, and especially what their religious beliefs are. Thanks Heather for the wonderful post. I will be thinking about this all day with the people that I come in contact with...perhaps it will help me have a better outlook on Primary and who we should call to be teachers, etc...
Thanks Heather! This post reminded me a little of the lesson I gave in RS today. It was Elder Holland's talk "the tongue of angels" (a good read if anyone has time). He says that negative speach usually stems from negative thoughts. I think that sometimes we judge people before we get to know them based on these negative thoughts, etc. Anyway... I don't even know if that makes sense but I really liked your post... way to go!
So insightful, Heath!!I love this! You're right - people are AMAZING! If we'd stop criticizing or comparing for two seconds we'd all have better lives. THakns for these thoughts. LOVE them!
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