Hi friends. I just had to announce that: (drum roll) . . . . . my paper is done! It took staying up until 4:00 am to accomplish it, but at least it is done. The last several pages are definitely not as great as they could be. I probably could have expounded a whole lot more, and I only ended up with 16 pages rather than the desired 20, but ya know, I kind of don't care at this point. I'm going to go make three copies, stick them in the various professor's boxes, and pray and hope that they're too busy with other things to ask for revisions (you can pray too if you want!).
Welcome Christmas break!!!
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Friday, December 14, 2007
Plenty to do
Hi friends. So, I'm in the middle of writing this paper, and I focus really well for awhile, but then I get to a roadblock and so what do I do? I do what any good college student does. I check my e-mail for the nth time, and I look to see if anybody has updated their blogs since I last checked an hour ago. You would think I would get done a lot quicker if I didn't allow myself to do this. You would probably be right. It's amazing to me how I can get one page down in a half hour or so, but then the next page takes 2 hours. And then maybe the third and fourth pages come quickly, but that fifth page . . . Sigh! Ok, enough delaying. Maybe if none of you have updated your blogs by the time I get to another distraction I will post again.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
We Wish You a Merry Christmas?
Heard this on the radio the other day. Started dying laughing about 1:06 into the song. Just didn't seem to match her style. Enjoy!
Friday, November 30, 2007
Crying
I don't like to cry. I'm not sure if it's because I'm not inclined to cry much in the first place, and therefore I'm not very used to it. Or maybe it's really the other way around--maybe I'm not inclined to cry because I don't like it because of some forgotten experience that is deep-rooted in my subconscious. Who knows.
But back to my original point. Even worse than crying is crying in public. I avoid it at all costs! Lucky for me I am pretty good at suppressing any tears that may try to push through. Probably
not very healthy, I know, but there you have it.
So I know this seems like a weird topic, but I guess it's been on my mind a lot the last couple of days. For some reason, I was close to tears all day yesterday. Not for any specific reasons. I guess my excuse would be, "because I'm a girl." I wasn't sad, or upset (to my knowledge). Actually, one of the moments where I almost cried was in the middle of teaching violin lessons. Some of the girls I teach were playing a Christmas duet and it was really touching. And I almost cried.
Today I had a reason to cry. I found out this morning that one of our percussion players took his life Wednesday evening. So sad! It's hard to think about the state someone would have to be in to want to end their own life. It made me grateful that that has never been one of my trials. But it also made me think of the people I know who struggle with depression and the constant battles they face to want to keep going each day. It made me realize the delicacy of life. It made me want to love better, to lift more. To live better and more fully.
Our rehearsal today, as you can imagine, was not typical. Kory, as usual, handled it perfectly, discussing his knowledge of the atonement and the Savior's love for this young man. He talked about the way that being in an orchestra bonds you to the other members, even though you may not know them well. He shared some scriptures and some words from Elder Wirthlin's last talk. Everything he said was so appropriate. There were many tears shed. I did not cry. I did not let myself. I did not let myself cry as Nate, weeping, said one of the most beautiful, sincere, and profound prayers I have ever heard. I kept my eyes open so I wouldn't. And still, as I write this, I do not let myself cry. And I'm not sure why.
I'm not entirely sure why I'm blogging about this. I suppose it's a little personal. Partly because I don't know how else to release these feelings I'm having. I'm sad, but I'm grateful. And I'm happy. I have so much happiness in my life right now. I don't like talking about sad things very much. Probably because I don't want to cry. I often like to deal with things internally. And even yesterday, when I didn't have this great tragedy to cry about, when the tears were close to the surface all day--now as I reflect, perhaps it was my body's way of trying to release something. Maybe some stress or something. And I didn't it allow it. Maybe I should cry. I probably won't.
Thanks though--I feel much better.
But back to my original point. Even worse than crying is crying in public. I avoid it at all costs! Lucky for me I am pretty good at suppressing any tears that may try to push through. Probably
not very healthy, I know, but there you have it.
So I know this seems like a weird topic, but I guess it's been on my mind a lot the last couple of days. For some reason, I was close to tears all day yesterday. Not for any specific reasons. I guess my excuse would be, "because I'm a girl." I wasn't sad, or upset (to my knowledge). Actually, one of the moments where I almost cried was in the middle of teaching violin lessons. Some of the girls I teach were playing a Christmas duet and it was really touching. And I almost cried.
Today I had a reason to cry. I found out this morning that one of our percussion players took his life Wednesday evening. So sad! It's hard to think about the state someone would have to be in to want to end their own life. It made me grateful that that has never been one of my trials. But it also made me think of the people I know who struggle with depression and the constant battles they face to want to keep going each day. It made me realize the delicacy of life. It made me want to love better, to lift more. To live better and more fully.
Our rehearsal today, as you can imagine, was not typical. Kory, as usual, handled it perfectly, discussing his knowledge of the atonement and the Savior's love for this young man. He talked about the way that being in an orchestra bonds you to the other members, even though you may not know them well. He shared some scriptures and some words from Elder Wirthlin's last talk. Everything he said was so appropriate. There were many tears shed. I did not cry. I did not let myself. I did not let myself cry as Nate, weeping, said one of the most beautiful, sincere, and profound prayers I have ever heard. I kept my eyes open so I wouldn't. And still, as I write this, I do not let myself cry. And I'm not sure why.
I'm not entirely sure why I'm blogging about this. I suppose it's a little personal. Partly because I don't know how else to release these feelings I'm having. I'm sad, but I'm grateful. And I'm happy. I have so much happiness in my life right now. I don't like talking about sad things very much. Probably because I don't want to cry. I often like to deal with things internally. And even yesterday, when I didn't have this great tragedy to cry about, when the tears were close to the surface all day--now as I reflect, perhaps it was my body's way of trying to release something. Maybe some stress or something. And I didn't it allow it. Maybe I should cry. I probably won't.
Thanks though--I feel much better.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Good idea/Bad idea
Remember the good idea/bad idea segments on Animaniacs? Ha! Good memories.
So the question I pose to you today is: What's worse than having to listen The 12 Days of Christmas while shopping at the grocery store?
Answer: Having to listen to an instrumental arrangement of The 12 Days of Christmas while shopping at the grocery store. You may think it wouldn't be as obnoxious, but I tell you, it is 10 times worse! Do you realize how repetitive that song is melodically? Definitely a BAD idea.
So the question I pose to you today is: What's worse than having to listen The 12 Days of Christmas while shopping at the grocery store?
Answer: Having to listen to an instrumental arrangement of The 12 Days of Christmas while shopping at the grocery store. You may think it wouldn't be as obnoxious, but I tell you, it is 10 times worse! Do you realize how repetitive that song is melodically? Definitely a BAD idea.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Give me a sign
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One of the things I love about coming home to Bountiful is passing the church on 400 N. and 400 E. that always has some cheesy saying on their marquee. I love how much effort they must put into these sayings. They often change it on a weekly basis, but sometimes it takes them a little longer (inspiration is just harder to come by some days, right?). This week (and last) it said something to the effect of "Various fruits create many jams"--yeah, I don't think I have it quite right, but their's didn't make much more sense that that version.
On my mission, there were such signs on every other corner, especially in Burlington Iowa. I think my favorite from there (and I've seen variations elsewhere) said something along the lines of "Don't let the next time you go to church be in a hearse." Classic! The "God reads knee-mail" one was also from my mission. (BTW, you can make your own church sign here.)
Often when I pass church signs (which doesn't happen very often--Provo/Orem is sadly lacking in this area . . . at least the streets I drive on), I think of good ol' Ron Crummett and the classic "Free Beer" story (I don't think I can count on two hands how many times I heard that story told). For those of you who may not be familiar with Ron Crummett or the free beer story it is this:
Ron and his brother, who lived in Boise?, randomly decided it would be really funny if a church marquee said "Free Beer." So, whenever they passed a church they would look to see if the right letters were present. They never were. Finally, when Ron's brother was on his mission, Ron saw the right letters. He stopped, made the girl he was with stand watch, and he changed the letters around to say "Free Beer". Reportedly the next day at ward council, one of the counselors from the bishopbric said something like, "Hey, that church down the road has figured out how to get people to come to church" and then relayed what he saw. Ron's dad (aka Brother Crummett), who was present at ward council, and who also knew about his sons' ongoing joke about church signs, returned home not too pleased with Ron's success. (Does that sound about right you guys. I think he may have done it one other time, but who knows.) Anywho, pretty funny. I still sometimes look to see if the "right" letters are there.
So do any of you have a favorite church sign saying? Or maybe some of you are budding church sign saying creators. Either way, please share. If your memory/creative juices need a little jump-start you can go here. I can't wait to see what little gems you all come up with.
Friday, November 9, 2007
What I've been up to
Well friends, it's a miracle, but it is true: I have not practiced more than an hour each day since my recital (that of course doesn't include orchestra rehearsals). I'm sure I'll be up to a couple of hours again after the novelty wears off, but for now I don't mind.
"So," you ask, "what have you been doing with all that spare time?" Well, I will tell you.
1. Laughing!--I typically smile and laugh a fair amount, perhaps more than the average American. But I don't often participate in uncontrollable, side-splitting, tear-producing laughter. I'm not entirely sure why, but everything this week has struck me as unbelievably funny. I've been laughing during orchestra rehearsals, at students' lessons (don't worry, not at them), in the library, while listening to the radio, and in the middle of concerts (actually, it was intermission, but Leslie and I did exchange a few silent giggles during the concert). My abs actually were sore yesterday as a result!
2. Causing discussions among the faculty--Apparently they've been holding meetings to consider awarding me the violin professorship. J/k! So, about a week ago I sent an e-mail to a couple of faculty inquiring about a class I need in order to graduate, which isn't being offered (an oversight on their part). I received a response (which was copied to several other faculty) saying something to the effect of, "Yeah, yeah, everything is cool, just talk to the adviser." The next day I received an e-mail from the adviser saying, "Heather, so-and-so doesn't know what they're talking about. Don't do anything until you hear from me." And for the past week as I've seen various faculty in the hall they've said things such as, "Hey we just had a meeting about your 505B case" and "We're working on 505B for you" and my personal favorite: one of the faculty added me as a friend on facebook and then this week wrote on my wall, "Good luck with 505B." Wow, I had no idea so many people had to get involved in order to get a class added to the registration.
So, at my lesson on Wednesday, Kory and I were discussing everything that is coming up for me, including this 505B course. We both had some questions about the format of the course, so he called the grad studies chair (Dr. D.) and we ended up at his office. Well he (Dr. D.) shared with me some e-mails that had been sent about the issue (not really answering our simple question about the format of the class), and in the midst of the discussion another involved faculty member walked by, so they pulled her into the office. Well they're all discussing everything except what I needed to know, answering each others' questions with questions, talking in circles and sort of misunderstanding each other. It was incredible. So they called the graduate adviser in. The debate and circles continued for a moment until finally everyone was miraculously on the same page (the conclusion being the one I had initially come to). They never did answer my question, but at least I received an e-mail the next day saying I could add the course. Academia is an interesting world!
3. I washed my car--It had been months! It was filthy. I realized it could not be put off any longer last week when the grime was dripping as the frost melted. I guess this means it will rain in a day or two, but at least it's cleaner than it was!
4. Observing information--I'm trying really hard to get motivated to write this paper. So I've been looking up information in books, online, and at the library. And I've really enjoyed my time doing so! I love walking through the stacks and discovering a random score of music I didn't know about, or learning about new persons connected with historical figures. Often to the point where I get distracted from the topic I'm actually studying. I find it much more interesting to observe a large amount of data than to focus in on a very specific portion of that data. So I decided that if I ever have a career in academia it will be this: observer of data. I'll let other people record and compare that information. I just want to notice it.
5. Attending fabulous concerts--The Guarneri String Quartet is one of the preeminent string quartets in the world. They've been together for 40 years and they're going to be retiring within the next year or two. They performed last night at BYU and it was really fantastic playing. They played as "one". I can't really describe it very succinctly and in non-musical terms, so I'm not going to attempt to right here. But it was music-making at its best (though you could tell the first violinist is getting old--his vibrato was just a little slower and wider than a younger man's).
6. Reading blogs--Keep them coming!
7. Missing this guy--No, no. Not that one. The one on the right.
Royce has been flying around for interviews for internships and it seems like he's been gone more than he's been here the past couple of weeks. But don't worry, he had his last one today! (Yeah, I know, I stole the picture from your facebook profile Royce. Hope you don't mind.)
"So," you ask, "what have you been doing with all that spare time?" Well, I will tell you.
1. Laughing!--I typically smile and laugh a fair amount, perhaps more than the average American. But I don't often participate in uncontrollable, side-splitting, tear-producing laughter. I'm not entirely sure why, but everything this week has struck me as unbelievably funny. I've been laughing during orchestra rehearsals, at students' lessons (don't worry, not at them), in the library, while listening to the radio, and in the middle of concerts (actually, it was intermission, but Leslie and I did exchange a few silent giggles during the concert). My abs actually were sore yesterday as a result!
2. Causing discussions among the faculty--Apparently they've been holding meetings to consider awarding me the violin professorship. J/k! So, about a week ago I sent an e-mail to a couple of faculty inquiring about a class I need in order to graduate, which isn't being offered (an oversight on their part). I received a response (which was copied to several other faculty) saying something to the effect of, "Yeah, yeah, everything is cool, just talk to the adviser." The next day I received an e-mail from the adviser saying, "Heather, so-and-so doesn't know what they're talking about. Don't do anything until you hear from me." And for the past week as I've seen various faculty in the hall they've said things such as, "Hey we just had a meeting about your 505B case" and "We're working on 505B for you" and my personal favorite: one of the faculty added me as a friend on facebook and then this week wrote on my wall, "Good luck with 505B." Wow, I had no idea so many people had to get involved in order to get a class added to the registration.
So, at my lesson on Wednesday, Kory and I were discussing everything that is coming up for me, including this 505B course. We both had some questions about the format of the course, so he called the grad studies chair (Dr. D.) and we ended up at his office. Well he (Dr. D.) shared with me some e-mails that had been sent about the issue (not really answering our simple question about the format of the class), and in the midst of the discussion another involved faculty member walked by, so they pulled her into the office. Well they're all discussing everything except what I needed to know, answering each others' questions with questions, talking in circles and sort of misunderstanding each other. It was incredible. So they called the graduate adviser in. The debate and circles continued for a moment until finally everyone was miraculously on the same page (the conclusion being the one I had initially come to). They never did answer my question, but at least I received an e-mail the next day saying I could add the course. Academia is an interesting world!
3. I washed my car--It had been months! It was filthy. I realized it could not be put off any longer last week when the grime was dripping as the frost melted. I guess this means it will rain in a day or two, but at least it's cleaner than it was!
4. Observing information--I'm trying really hard to get motivated to write this paper. So I've been looking up information in books, online, and at the library. And I've really enjoyed my time doing so! I love walking through the stacks and discovering a random score of music I didn't know about, or learning about new persons connected with historical figures. Often to the point where I get distracted from the topic I'm actually studying. I find it much more interesting to observe a large amount of data than to focus in on a very specific portion of that data. So I decided that if I ever have a career in academia it will be this: observer of data. I'll let other people record and compare that information. I just want to notice it.
5. Attending fabulous concerts--The Guarneri String Quartet is one of the preeminent string quartets in the world. They've been together for 40 years and they're going to be retiring within the next year or two. They performed last night at BYU and it was really fantastic playing. They played as "one". I can't really describe it very succinctly and in non-musical terms, so I'm not going to attempt to right here. But it was music-making at its best (though you could tell the first violinist is getting old--his vibrato was just a little slower and wider than a younger man's).
6. Reading blogs--Keep them coming!
7. Missing this guy--No, no. Not that one. The one on the right.
Royce has been flying around for interviews for internships and it seems like he's been gone more than he's been here the past couple of weeks. But don't worry, he had his last one today! (Yeah, I know, I stole the picture from your facebook profile Royce. Hope you don't mind.)
Saturday, November 3, 2007
Not a joke
First of all, my deepest apologies to those of you who may have been traumatized by my last post. Hopefully by now you have read the explanation in my comments. If not, I encourage you to do so now.
Now, a post about an event that really happened.
My graduate recital!
It was this morning, and it went pretty great actually. I was a little bit nervous, but I countered that by telling myself that it's not about playing perfectly. It's really just about having a musical experience--about sharing my love of music with the audience. Which I think I did.
It was interesting to hear people's feedback about what they liked best. I was pleasantly surprised how many people liked the Bach best. Delighted actually, because that's my favorite thing to play. I worry, though, about it being entertaining enough for the audience. It's a little more introspective and thoughtful than the other works. But apparently people got it. Perhaps if I ever figure out the video application I'll put part of it on here.
Not too much else to say. Oh, I had a pretty fantastic outfit. Hopefully someone took pictures with a digital camera so I can post them.
And thanks to all of you who came (this week and last)--I really appreciate the sacrifices you made to be there. And those of you who couldn't come but wanted to, thanks to you too. I still feel the love.
Now, a post about an event that really happened.
My graduate recital!
It was this morning, and it went pretty great actually. I was a little bit nervous, but I countered that by telling myself that it's not about playing perfectly. It's really just about having a musical experience--about sharing my love of music with the audience. Which I think I did.
It was interesting to hear people's feedback about what they liked best. I was pleasantly surprised how many people liked the Bach best. Delighted actually, because that's my favorite thing to play. I worry, though, about it being entertaining enough for the audience. It's a little more introspective and thoughtful than the other works. But apparently people got it. Perhaps if I ever figure out the video application I'll put part of it on here.
Not too much else to say. Oh, I had a pretty fantastic outfit. Hopefully someone took pictures with a digital camera so I can post them.
And thanks to all of you who came (this week and last)--I really appreciate the sacrifices you made to be there. And those of you who couldn't come but wanted to, thanks to you too. I still feel the love.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
My poor violin...
On Saturday I was performing my dress rehearsal (make sure you all come to my real recital as I didn't see most of you there) and I was playing Sibelius's concerto 2nd movement and was playing really quickly and the strings to my violin snapped and whacked me in the face (I am o.k.) causing me to drop my violin, causing my violin to break. This is roughly what it looked like but worse:
This is what my face looked like:
Needless to say the performance didn't end very well. Hopefully next Saturday will be a lot better, but probably not quite so entertaining for those that attend.
This is what my face looked like:
Needless to say the performance didn't end very well. Hopefully next Saturday will be a lot better, but probably not quite so entertaining for those that attend.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
How nice to have an advocate
(Warning! This post reads like a personal history. I have been feeling the need to write this down and chose my blog as the recipient for the story. It is lengthy, and not very interesting except to myself. Therefore, I will not feel bad if you don't read it.)
This is Kory.
He is the director of the BYU Philharmonic and Chamber Orchestras.
He is also my violin teacher.
My sister came up with a word for my relationship with Kory--he is my advocate.
For some reason Kory has always really liked and respected me. Maybe it's because I always show up to rehearsal. Maybe it's because I practice my orchestra parts. Maybe it's because of my charming personality . . . ummm, well, probably not so much.
On the flip side, I have always liked and respected Kory. When he first came to BYU he got a lot of flak from the older students because he did things differently than their previous conductor. I never thought he was really deserving of their criticism.
Before my mission I had five different violin teachers at BYU. Some were good, some were great, and some were a trial. I never sought out Kory for a violin teacher though. He was just an orchestral director in my eyes. He had some students, but none of the really good players were in his studio.
Post-mission, I found myself returning to BYU, quite unexpectedly. And here, I interrupt the flow of my story to describe Kory's first act as my advocate. Part of the reason I even considered returning to BYU was because I had heard that the Chamber Orchestra was going on tour to Great Britain. (Not the greatest reason for choosing a graduate school I suppose, but I felt good about the decision nonetheless.) I really wanted to go, but I didn't know how on earth it could work out because chamber orchestra rehearsals started in September and I wasn't coming home until December.
So I sent him an e-mail (with my mission president's permission, of course) that said something along the lines of: "Hi Kory. Hope life is treating you well. . . . I have been realizing how much I miss being in the BYU orchestras . . . (more flattery) . . . What are the chances of being able to join the BYU Chamber Orchestra when I get back? I don't know if I would be able to get into the graduate program this late. If I could even just come play in the Philharmonic it would be better than not doing any orchestra (this statement was just for good measure). Thanks . . . "
The next week I received a response that said: "Heather. Good to hear from you. If you decided to come back, I would for sure save you a spot in Chamber! I need to know your decision soon though as auditions are in a couple of weeks . . ." I was shocked. I had always thought of Kory as playing by the rules, but here he was bending them for me. His intervention didn't stop there though. The School of Music doesn't normally accept people for January enrollment. I know my case was discussed at several meetings, and I know that Kory was my pulling for me harder than anyone. As a result, I got in.
Now, back to where I was going before. The one downside to returning to BYU was that there was no one I wanted to take lessons from. I was starting to doubt the wisdom in basing my graduate school decision on an orchestral experience rather than on a really great violin teacher. I decided--a little hesitantly--to be in Kory's studio.
One of the best decisions I ever made.
Not too much to say about the first couple of semesters, other than that he was really encouraging and patient as I made the transition from missionary to musician. I recall one day when I just didn't feel well, I hadn't practiced much, and I came to my lesson feeling really discouraged. After playing through a new caprice, he asked me what I wanted to play for him next (one of the great things about lessons with Kory is he lets you decide what to focus on). I said, "Well, I could play ____ for you again. I don't know." Again he inquired, "Well, what would be the most helpful for you?" I started to say something, and then I just lost it. The tears came, and out came the explanation of how I had not been feeling well, and I was sorry I wasn't more prepared, and I was sorry I was crying (I don't think I had ever cried in a violin lesson before). And he responded, "You know what Heather, lets not worry about playing today. That's not important right now. Why don't you put your instrument away and why don't we listen to the recording of Beethoven (our most recent concert)." And we spent the next 40 minutes listening to and discussing our concert.
Ok, back to the real story (wow, if this isn't the longest blog entry ever. I had no idea I had so much to say on the subject). Last winter semester I was debating taking some orchestra auditions. I felt super inadequate, and almost didn't go for it, but guess who was my biggest supporter? That's right. Kory spent numerous lessons talking me through all of these decisions. He was patient as I went back and forth, changing my mind weekly. When I finally decided to take the auditions, he helped me through all of the excerpts, even giving me extra lessons for free after the semester was over. I think the way he put it when I offered to pay him and he refused was, "Let's not look at this as a teacher-student thing. Let's look at this as a colleague helping a fellow colleague." Wow!
After each audition I called to let him know how it had gone. He expressed his pleasure at my having done so well, and he wanted to know the details of what the process had been like, and which excerpts I had played.
Later in the summer, I had a million decisions to make. Whether or not to take more orchestra auditions, what to play on my graduate recital, whether or not to take certain classes, when to graduate, whether or not I should play in orchestra, how much teaching to take on, etc. I called him a couple of times and the man patiently talked me through all of these decisions, helping me to come to conclusions that I felt good about. I think most people would have said, "I don't know. That's something you have to figure out. Pray about it." And they would probably be right. But I'm glad Kory took the time to help me through my muddled state.
And finally this semester: I cannot sing his praises enough. My graduate recital is in two short weeks (yikes, did I really just say TWO weeks?). Let's count the ways that he has helped make it an easier process for me. I'll be brief. First of all, he intervened with the scheduling office to arrange a time that was more convenient for everyone. Secondly, he told me to not worry about playing the opera because it starts this weekend and runs through next week (this has meant extra practice time during the day since I haven't had to go to orchestra, as well as not having to stay up late for days in a row to play the show). And thirdly, he told me I don't have to do the concertmaster auditions that are coming up, and I'm even assuming he won't put me in the back of the section as a result. Oh, and let me just mention that he had a new grand baby last week, so he flew to California over the weekend; his flight came in on Monday at 9:15, and he was at BYU at 10:30 for my pre-recital hearing.
What has he gotten out of all of this? He lost a player for the opera, he lost lots of time in talking with me and about my situation to other people, and he may have even gotten other students upset at him for helping me out. I guess that's sort of the definition of an advocate (my definition at least)--someone who intervenes/helps/pleads on behalf of someone else without any expectation of receiving recompense.
It reminds me of a scripture: "I say unto you . . . if you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, . . . I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants. And behold, all that he requires of you is to keep his commandments. . . . for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hath paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever" (Mosiah 2:20-22, 24).
How grateful I am for advocates, especially our great advocate, even the Savior Jesus Christ.
Thanks Kory, for reminding me how to be more like the Savior.
This is Kory.
He is the director of the BYU Philharmonic and Chamber Orchestras.
He is also my violin teacher.
My sister came up with a word for my relationship with Kory--he is my advocate.
For some reason Kory has always really liked and respected me. Maybe it's because I always show up to rehearsal. Maybe it's because I practice my orchestra parts. Maybe it's because of my charming personality . . . ummm, well, probably not so much.
On the flip side, I have always liked and respected Kory. When he first came to BYU he got a lot of flak from the older students because he did things differently than their previous conductor. I never thought he was really deserving of their criticism.
Before my mission I had five different violin teachers at BYU. Some were good, some were great, and some were a trial. I never sought out Kory for a violin teacher though. He was just an orchestral director in my eyes. He had some students, but none of the really good players were in his studio.
Post-mission, I found myself returning to BYU, quite unexpectedly. And here, I interrupt the flow of my story to describe Kory's first act as my advocate. Part of the reason I even considered returning to BYU was because I had heard that the Chamber Orchestra was going on tour to Great Britain. (Not the greatest reason for choosing a graduate school I suppose, but I felt good about the decision nonetheless.) I really wanted to go, but I didn't know how on earth it could work out because chamber orchestra rehearsals started in September and I wasn't coming home until December.
So I sent him an e-mail (with my mission president's permission, of course) that said something along the lines of: "Hi Kory. Hope life is treating you well. . . . I have been realizing how much I miss being in the BYU orchestras . . . (more flattery) . . . What are the chances of being able to join the BYU Chamber Orchestra when I get back? I don't know if I would be able to get into the graduate program this late. If I could even just come play in the Philharmonic it would be better than not doing any orchestra (this statement was just for good measure). Thanks . . . "
The next week I received a response that said: "Heather. Good to hear from you. If you decided to come back, I would for sure save you a spot in Chamber! I need to know your decision soon though as auditions are in a couple of weeks . . ." I was shocked. I had always thought of Kory as playing by the rules, but here he was bending them for me. His intervention didn't stop there though. The School of Music doesn't normally accept people for January enrollment. I know my case was discussed at several meetings, and I know that Kory was my pulling for me harder than anyone. As a result, I got in.
Now, back to where I was going before. The one downside to returning to BYU was that there was no one I wanted to take lessons from. I was starting to doubt the wisdom in basing my graduate school decision on an orchestral experience rather than on a really great violin teacher. I decided--a little hesitantly--to be in Kory's studio.
One of the best decisions I ever made.
Not too much to say about the first couple of semesters, other than that he was really encouraging and patient as I made the transition from missionary to musician. I recall one day when I just didn't feel well, I hadn't practiced much, and I came to my lesson feeling really discouraged. After playing through a new caprice, he asked me what I wanted to play for him next (one of the great things about lessons with Kory is he lets you decide what to focus on). I said, "Well, I could play ____ for you again. I don't know." Again he inquired, "Well, what would be the most helpful for you?" I started to say something, and then I just lost it. The tears came, and out came the explanation of how I had not been feeling well, and I was sorry I wasn't more prepared, and I was sorry I was crying (I don't think I had ever cried in a violin lesson before). And he responded, "You know what Heather, lets not worry about playing today. That's not important right now. Why don't you put your instrument away and why don't we listen to the recording of Beethoven (our most recent concert)." And we spent the next 40 minutes listening to and discussing our concert.
Ok, back to the real story (wow, if this isn't the longest blog entry ever. I had no idea I had so much to say on the subject). Last winter semester I was debating taking some orchestra auditions. I felt super inadequate, and almost didn't go for it, but guess who was my biggest supporter? That's right. Kory spent numerous lessons talking me through all of these decisions. He was patient as I went back and forth, changing my mind weekly. When I finally decided to take the auditions, he helped me through all of the excerpts, even giving me extra lessons for free after the semester was over. I think the way he put it when I offered to pay him and he refused was, "Let's not look at this as a teacher-student thing. Let's look at this as a colleague helping a fellow colleague." Wow!
After each audition I called to let him know how it had gone. He expressed his pleasure at my having done so well, and he wanted to know the details of what the process had been like, and which excerpts I had played.
Later in the summer, I had a million decisions to make. Whether or not to take more orchestra auditions, what to play on my graduate recital, whether or not to take certain classes, when to graduate, whether or not I should play in orchestra, how much teaching to take on, etc. I called him a couple of times and the man patiently talked me through all of these decisions, helping me to come to conclusions that I felt good about. I think most people would have said, "I don't know. That's something you have to figure out. Pray about it." And they would probably be right. But I'm glad Kory took the time to help me through my muddled state.
And finally this semester: I cannot sing his praises enough. My graduate recital is in two short weeks (yikes, did I really just say TWO weeks?). Let's count the ways that he has helped make it an easier process for me. I'll be brief. First of all, he intervened with the scheduling office to arrange a time that was more convenient for everyone. Secondly, he told me to not worry about playing the opera because it starts this weekend and runs through next week (this has meant extra practice time during the day since I haven't had to go to orchestra, as well as not having to stay up late for days in a row to play the show). And thirdly, he told me I don't have to do the concertmaster auditions that are coming up, and I'm even assuming he won't put me in the back of the section as a result. Oh, and let me just mention that he had a new grand baby last week, so he flew to California over the weekend; his flight came in on Monday at 9:15, and he was at BYU at 10:30 for my pre-recital hearing.
What has he gotten out of all of this? He lost a player for the opera, he lost lots of time in talking with me and about my situation to other people, and he may have even gotten other students upset at him for helping me out. I guess that's sort of the definition of an advocate (my definition at least)--someone who intervenes/helps/pleads on behalf of someone else without any expectation of receiving recompense.
It reminds me of a scripture: "I say unto you . . . if you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, . . . I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants. And behold, all that he requires of you is to keep his commandments. . . . for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hath paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever" (Mosiah 2:20-22, 24).
How grateful I am for advocates, especially our great advocate, even the Savior Jesus Christ.
Thanks Kory, for reminding me how to be more like the Savior.
Monday, October 15, 2007
I passed!
Yay!!!
My pre-recital hearing is over, and I passed (I started getting a tiny bit worried after 3 or 4 minutes of waiting in the hall for their verdict), which means that I get to have my recital on November 3rd!
I guess there really wasn't much of a question of me not passing, but it's still nice to have the experience behind me. Also, I felt pretty good about my performance--I played the Paganini better than I've ever performed it! (Now, if I could just perform it as well as I practice it. Sigh.)
My pre-recital hearing is over, and I passed (I started getting a tiny bit worried after 3 or 4 minutes of waiting in the hall for their verdict), which means that I get to have my recital on November 3rd!
I guess there really wasn't much of a question of me not passing, but it's still nice to have the experience behind me. Also, I felt pretty good about my performance--I played the Paganini better than I've ever performed it! (Now, if I could just perform it as well as I practice it. Sigh.)
Friday, October 12, 2007
Are you happy?
"Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God."
Joseph Smith
Have you ever stopped to think about what that really means? It means that the purpose of life, the reason we are here on earth, is to be happy, or to discover happiness, if you will! For some reason that really strikes a chord with me.
Happiness had already been on my mind a lot lately, and then on Thursday we spent a whole lecture on it in my religion class (taught by my mission president, Brent L. Top). Let me tell you what, there are some cool things in the scriptures about "the plan of happiness".
Immediately a scripture comes to mind: "Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy" (2 Nephi 2:25). I'm also reminded to "consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold they are blessed in all things . . . and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness" (Mosiah 2:41). Have you considered why that is so?
Well, in order to dwell with God, we have to be like God, right? And what is God like? In Alma 41:11 there is a direct parallel between the nature of God and the nature of happiness. So when we take on His other attributes, I believe we also take on His happiness.
I'm doing a really poor job of describing how great this is. I wish I had Lori's gift for profundity right now. It's so obvious, yet we forget it all the time! We focus sometimes too much on the fact that "life is a test" and "life is hard" (I attended a Stake Conference about a year ago where that was the theme--I've never been so depressed after a church meeting in my life!). And of course life is hard, but ultimately life, and especially a life centered around Jesus Christ, is all about happiness, despite trials and sadness. I even believe that we can be happy even when we are sad (or stressed, or frustrated, or tired, or . . . anything)--the one doesn't necessarily cancel out the other.
And what goes hand in hand with happiness? GRATITUDE! I am so grateful for the MILLIONS of things God has blessed me with, all of which are reasons to be happy. In fact, I'm grateful to be happy!
Joseph Smith
Have you ever stopped to think about what that really means? It means that the purpose of life, the reason we are here on earth, is to be happy, or to discover happiness, if you will! For some reason that really strikes a chord with me.
Happiness had already been on my mind a lot lately, and then on Thursday we spent a whole lecture on it in my religion class (taught by my mission president, Brent L. Top). Let me tell you what, there are some cool things in the scriptures about "the plan of happiness".
Immediately a scripture comes to mind: "Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy" (2 Nephi 2:25). I'm also reminded to "consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold they are blessed in all things . . . and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness" (Mosiah 2:41). Have you considered why that is so?
Well, in order to dwell with God, we have to be like God, right? And what is God like? In Alma 41:11 there is a direct parallel between the nature of God and the nature of happiness. So when we take on His other attributes, I believe we also take on His happiness.
I'm doing a really poor job of describing how great this is. I wish I had Lori's gift for profundity right now. It's so obvious, yet we forget it all the time! We focus sometimes too much on the fact that "life is a test" and "life is hard" (I attended a Stake Conference about a year ago where that was the theme--I've never been so depressed after a church meeting in my life!). And of course life is hard, but ultimately life, and especially a life centered around Jesus Christ, is all about happiness, despite trials and sadness. I even believe that we can be happy even when we are sad (or stressed, or frustrated, or tired, or . . . anything)--the one doesn't necessarily cancel out the other.
And what goes hand in hand with happiness? GRATITUDE! I am so grateful for the MILLIONS of things God has blessed me with, all of which are reasons to be happy. In fact, I'm grateful to be happy!
Monday, October 8, 2007
Mondays
I really love Mondays. Strange, I know. Mondays are the days people dread--it means going back to work/school, being responsible, not sleeping in (unless you have kids, and then you never get to sleep in). But it also means a fresh start, having a little more energy because of the extra rest, and tackling all the things you didn't have time for the week before. I think it's the structure of Mondays that I really like. Saturdays, which typically have zero structure, are not my favorite. Even when I was younger I was never a big fan of Saturdays. The day went too quick and I never seemed to get anything done before 4:00 or so. I do a little better with my Saturdays these days, but still . . . I just like Mondays best.
Any other Monday fans out there?
Any other Monday fans out there?
I must have been cold last night . . .
. . . because I dreamt that someone had turned our air-conditioning on cold. I think I was in the process of writing a note to leave by the thermostat to kindly remind people that when it's cold we should turn on the heat, when I woke up.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Getting cold
I don't know about where you all live, but here in Utah it has been rather cold as of late. There have been lovely, warm moments, but the cooler temperatures seem to be taunting me with the imminence of winter.
I don't like winter.
I suppose there's a certain charm to winter if you think of hot chocolate, Christmas carols, sledding down hills, and colorful scarves. However, the reality is scraping car windshields, walking to campus with frozen fingers, and having to put on/take off layers upon layers of clothing when you leave/enter a building. In short, winter is a pain.
I'm told that you miss it when you live where there is no winter. My response--I'd like to see it before I believe it.
I don't like winter.
I suppose there's a certain charm to winter if you think of hot chocolate, Christmas carols, sledding down hills, and colorful scarves. However, the reality is scraping car windshields, walking to campus with frozen fingers, and having to put on/take off layers upon layers of clothing when you leave/enter a building. In short, winter is a pain.
I'm told that you miss it when you live where there is no winter. My response--I'd like to see it before I believe it.
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Vanity
I don't consider myself to be a vain person in general. I've always felt ok about the way I looked, but there's no feature that I'm particularly proud of . . . except one.
My hair.
Which I find humorous. I very much dislike spending any time on my hair. I resent how long it takes to wash, condition, comb, and blowdry. I don't like styling it (and rarely do, in fact). And in case you hadn't noticed, I never really change it. In fact, when it gets trimmed more than 3 inches I typically go through withdrawals. I'm happiest when it's long, BLONDE, and straight. Oh, and shiny.
I think it would be funny to end my post right there.
But I'm not going to.
Because I have to tell you about the sad saga of my hair as of late.
I've been going swimming 2-3 times a week this semester. Which has been really great for me. (I think I'm definitely the world's slowest swimmer, but I'll tell you what, my shoulders, neck and back have never felt so great!) Unfortunately there is a downside to all this healthy activity--it's killing my hair!
I have tried, more than once, to get a swimcap on, but I just have too much hair for it to stay on (ok, ok, it's probably just because my head is too big, but I like the hair excuse better). So I've tried other alternatives--saturating my hair in conditioner before I get in the pool, washing my hair with a swimmer's shampoo (and repeating!). But nothing seems to help all that much.
I'm therefore bound and determined to make the swimcap fit next time, because as much as I want to swim to keep my shoulders healthy, I don't know if it's worth the sacrifice of having non-shiny, non-silky hair.
See how vain I am!
My hair.
Which I find humorous. I very much dislike spending any time on my hair. I resent how long it takes to wash, condition, comb, and blowdry. I don't like styling it (and rarely do, in fact). And in case you hadn't noticed, I never really change it. In fact, when it gets trimmed more than 3 inches I typically go through withdrawals. I'm happiest when it's long, BLONDE, and straight. Oh, and shiny.
I think it would be funny to end my post right there.
But I'm not going to.
Because I have to tell you about the sad saga of my hair as of late.
I've been going swimming 2-3 times a week this semester. Which has been really great for me. (I think I'm definitely the world's slowest swimmer, but I'll tell you what, my shoulders, neck and back have never felt so great!) Unfortunately there is a downside to all this healthy activity--it's killing my hair!
I have tried, more than once, to get a swimcap on, but I just have too much hair for it to stay on (ok, ok, it's probably just because my head is too big, but I like the hair excuse better). So I've tried other alternatives--saturating my hair in conditioner before I get in the pool, washing my hair with a swimmer's shampoo (and repeating!). But nothing seems to help all that much.
I'm therefore bound and determined to make the swimcap fit next time, because as much as I want to swim to keep my shoulders healthy, I don't know if it's worth the sacrifice of having non-shiny, non-silky hair.
See how vain I am!
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Breaking my word
I know, I know. I said I was going to cut down on my posts, and here I am posting two days in a row! But it is the weekend, afterall. And I somehow doubt I'll get too many complaints in my comments section. Though I will say, I think my blog would be much more interesting if it included pictures, but alas, I probably will not acquire a digital camera for quite some time and I don't have any cute kids to take pictures of.
So the subject of this post . . . predictability. This is a new thing in my life, and I just wanted to comment on how much I'm enjoying it. I've always prided myself on my spontaneity--waking up and going to bed when I feel like it, practicing when I want to, practicing in any order I want to, etc. (I'm struggling to come up with more examples because that's basically the bulk of my day). Anyway, lately, as I've sort of mentioned before, I've gotten into a pretty strict schedule. Of course, within that schedule there are opportunities for variation, but for the most part I'm sticking to it and surprisingly . . . I love it!! You could say I've become a believer. Who would have thought that balance and order could be this enjoyable. It seemed so restrictive before, but in fact I feel liberated and free--kind of like the gospel (isn't everything like the gospel?).
That's all I have to say.
So the subject of this post . . . predictability. This is a new thing in my life, and I just wanted to comment on how much I'm enjoying it. I've always prided myself on my spontaneity--waking up and going to bed when I feel like it, practicing when I want to, practicing in any order I want to, etc. (I'm struggling to come up with more examples because that's basically the bulk of my day). Anyway, lately, as I've sort of mentioned before, I've gotten into a pretty strict schedule. Of course, within that schedule there are opportunities for variation, but for the most part I'm sticking to it and surprisingly . . . I love it!! You could say I've become a believer. Who would have thought that balance and order could be this enjoyable. It seemed so restrictive before, but in fact I feel liberated and free--kind of like the gospel (isn't everything like the gospel?).
That's all I have to say.
Friday, September 21, 2007
Fall!
I haven't felt this happy in a long time. I haven't been sad lately either. But this morning as I walked to campus there was a distinct lightness in my soul. Maybe it has something to do with going to the temple this morning, or maybe it has to do with the endorphins I got from jogging, or maybe it's because the air is a little crisper and cooler now that fall is approaching. Whatever the reason, I'm sure going to enjoy it!
That's not to say that my life is any less stressful. Quite the opposite. But I've been trying to remind myself to trust God a little more. To have faith and hope that He really is not going to lead me astray. I think I doubt far too frequently--I do it under the guise of doubting myself, but ultimately doesn't that amount to doubting Him?
It's time for orchestra, but I just had to share my thoughts with you all while they were still fresh. Enjoy the weather!
That's not to say that my life is any less stressful. Quite the opposite. But I've been trying to remind myself to trust God a little more. To have faith and hope that He really is not going to lead me astray. I think I doubt far too frequently--I do it under the guise of doubting myself, but ultimately doesn't that amount to doubting Him?
It's time for orchestra, but I just had to share my thoughts with you all while they were still fresh. Enjoy the weather!
Sunday, September 16, 2007
My apologies
Dear Friend(s),
Now that school is in, I sometimes forget that I have a blog which you occasionally check. And I apologize that each time you do the same old post is there. I would thus advise you to only check about once a week, probably on Saturdays or Sundays. I wish I could post more, but alas, my poor violin cannot stand to be neglected for very long at a time. It has a deadline to meet (November 3rd--recital!) and it acts up and has a bit of an attitude if I am not constantly focusing all my attention on it. I hope you understand. Until next week . . .
All my love,
Heather
Now that school is in, I sometimes forget that I have a blog which you occasionally check. And I apologize that each time you do the same old post is there. I would thus advise you to only check about once a week, probably on Saturdays or Sundays. I wish I could post more, but alas, my poor violin cannot stand to be neglected for very long at a time. It has a deadline to meet (November 3rd--recital!) and it acts up and has a bit of an attitude if I am not constantly focusing all my attention on it. I hope you understand. Until next week . . .
All my love,
Heather
Friday, September 7, 2007
Overdue
Am I way overdue for a post or what?! Now that school has started, I suppose my posts will become more sporadic. I also blame it on the fact that my laptop is currently at the doctor (aka HP)--it's just not the same creating posts on a computer that is not my own.
When I say that school has started, I mean it in the very loosest sense. My week has consisted of going to a religion class taught by my mission president, for which I will receive no credit, auditioning for orchestra seating, and picking up forms and e-mailing professors and obtaining signatures. Oh, and practicing and teaching, but I did that this summer too. Next week will consist of another audition, orchestra will begin, and . . . that's pretty much it.
I've decided to dub this semester "The semester of great self-control or else . . ." So far it's been pretty successful. I've managed to get up before 6 every day (well, except yesterday, but it was on purpose), exercise every day, and practice a good amount too. I'm still working on the food self-control (as I write there is an open bag of flavored Tootsie Rolls before me and many wrappers of the same in my pocket), but all in all, I'm pretty happy with myself. I only hope it will last! I've discovered that it is all dependent on one thing--going to bed early. Lucky for me, I have few friends close by so thus far there have not been too many social temptations.
The other things that are requiring self-control are more academic. I'm receiving 2 credits for my recital and 2 credits for my paper. The recital is a bit easier, just because I've been conditioned to feel guilt whenever I am not practicing. But the paper . . . man, I really need to get started! I read a couple of paragraphs today that were related to my topic--does that count? And in addition to this, I need to start working on my applications to doctoral programs, for which I receive no credit. It will be very interesting to give an accounting of my semester once it is all over, don't you think?
When I say that school has started, I mean it in the very loosest sense. My week has consisted of going to a religion class taught by my mission president, for which I will receive no credit, auditioning for orchestra seating, and picking up forms and e-mailing professors and obtaining signatures. Oh, and practicing and teaching, but I did that this summer too. Next week will consist of another audition, orchestra will begin, and . . . that's pretty much it.
I've decided to dub this semester "The semester of great self-control or else . . ." So far it's been pretty successful. I've managed to get up before 6 every day (well, except yesterday, but it was on purpose), exercise every day, and practice a good amount too. I'm still working on the food self-control (as I write there is an open bag of flavored Tootsie Rolls before me and many wrappers of the same in my pocket), but all in all, I'm pretty happy with myself. I only hope it will last! I've discovered that it is all dependent on one thing--going to bed early. Lucky for me, I have few friends close by so thus far there have not been too many social temptations.
The other things that are requiring self-control are more academic. I'm receiving 2 credits for my recital and 2 credits for my paper. The recital is a bit easier, just because I've been conditioned to feel guilt whenever I am not practicing. But the paper . . . man, I really need to get started! I read a couple of paragraphs today that were related to my topic--does that count? And in addition to this, I need to start working on my applications to doctoral programs, for which I receive no credit. It will be very interesting to give an accounting of my semester once it is all over, don't you think?
Monday, August 27, 2007
Spoiled
I read a little book this weekend by Roald Dahl--it's called "Boy: Tales of Childhood", or something like that. Basically it's a biography of Dahl's childhood. It was short, and read somewhat like a chapter book, but I would certainly never reccomend it to a child. It made me ever so grateful to be born when and where I was. It's almost unbelievable the experiences he had--stories about being caned in school, surgeries with no anesthetic, and constantly being accused of lying by teachers--you sort of wonder how they lived through it! I don't know that I've ever really experienced anything quite like it, though I do hate going to the dentist because the local anesthetic doesn't always really work for me!
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Selfish!
I've discovered something about myself (or maybe I've always known and just been in denial): I am a selfish person! I don't mean selfish in the sense that I'm a college student and therefore am only focusing on my education and not serving other people, etc. I mean that I am constantly only worried about me, about how others peoples' actions affect me, about how they inconvenience or offend me.
For instance, today there was a person playing the piano in the adjacent practice room, pounding out something they obviously made up. I was going crazy. I thought to myself, "Why does this talentless individual feel the need to play fake music in a room next to me, who am a talented graduate student?" Can we see the problem here? Good heavens! How about I just pray for the Lord to strip me of the gifts which He has lovingly, and I'm assuming trustingly, given me. Why should it inconvenience me if a person has a desire to create music, and therefore does it in the best way they know how, even if that consists of trying to learn every piece by John Schmidt? If they feel like they've accomplished something great and something hard, who am I to say, "Pshah, you think you're cool now, but you're not. Now get out of my building." Of course they're cool! Just the same as if I learn a difficult concerto, even though it may be mediocre, I'm cool for doing my best, even though Oistrakh and Perlman and Heifetz and Joshua Bell and Hillary Hahn can all do it 100 times better.
I think it would be like me going to the BYU pool (which has been one of my goals for months, and which I'm GOING to do as soon as they reopen it) and having the person I share a lane with think, and/or say, "You shouldn't be here. This pool is for people that actually know how to swim and have good form. If you're going to bother trying, do it somewhere where you won't be in my way." I can't think of anybody that would do that (except, I suppose, myself). Sigh!
I've actually been thinking about this a lot. When I drive I think, "Ooh, shame on that person that is going the speed limit when I want to go faster," or "Doesn't that person realize that I need to be in that lane and it's not my fault I didn't get over sooner?" or in general, "Why can't everybody just get out of my way! If it weren't for everyone else, I'd have gotten there 10 minutes ago!"
I'm also selfish in my situation with rommates, customer service people, and even people at church (funny story this last Sunday about that, which probably should not be shared on a blog). Multiple times each day I dwell on some way in which other people are "in my way" or "bugging me" or not considering my expert opinion on how things "ought to be done." I think if I thought in the opposite direction (ways that I might be inconveniencing other people) I would become really depressed.
I apologize for being so frank and open about my shortcomings. I hope I haven't disillusioned any of you--I suppose most of you know me too well to be surprised. I share this only because I hope that by admitting my shortcoming it will lead to quicker repentance. I've got the confession part down, now if I can just manage the forsaking part. Wish me luck!
For instance, today there was a person playing the piano in the adjacent practice room, pounding out something they obviously made up. I was going crazy. I thought to myself, "Why does this talentless individual feel the need to play fake music in a room next to me, who am a talented graduate student?" Can we see the problem here? Good heavens! How about I just pray for the Lord to strip me of the gifts which He has lovingly, and I'm assuming trustingly, given me. Why should it inconvenience me if a person has a desire to create music, and therefore does it in the best way they know how, even if that consists of trying to learn every piece by John Schmidt? If they feel like they've accomplished something great and something hard, who am I to say, "Pshah, you think you're cool now, but you're not. Now get out of my building." Of course they're cool! Just the same as if I learn a difficult concerto, even though it may be mediocre, I'm cool for doing my best, even though Oistrakh and Perlman and Heifetz and Joshua Bell and Hillary Hahn can all do it 100 times better.
I think it would be like me going to the BYU pool (which has been one of my goals for months, and which I'm GOING to do as soon as they reopen it) and having the person I share a lane with think, and/or say, "You shouldn't be here. This pool is for people that actually know how to swim and have good form. If you're going to bother trying, do it somewhere where you won't be in my way." I can't think of anybody that would do that (except, I suppose, myself). Sigh!
I've actually been thinking about this a lot. When I drive I think, "Ooh, shame on that person that is going the speed limit when I want to go faster," or "Doesn't that person realize that I need to be in that lane and it's not my fault I didn't get over sooner?" or in general, "Why can't everybody just get out of my way! If it weren't for everyone else, I'd have gotten there 10 minutes ago!"
I'm also selfish in my situation with rommates, customer service people, and even people at church (funny story this last Sunday about that, which probably should not be shared on a blog). Multiple times each day I dwell on some way in which other people are "in my way" or "bugging me" or not considering my expert opinion on how things "ought to be done." I think if I thought in the opposite direction (ways that I might be inconveniencing other people) I would become really depressed.
I apologize for being so frank and open about my shortcomings. I hope I haven't disillusioned any of you--I suppose most of you know me too well to be surprised. I share this only because I hope that by admitting my shortcoming it will lead to quicker repentance. I've got the confession part down, now if I can just manage the forsaking part. Wish me luck!
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Homecoming
How time flies! I've been home from my mission longer than I was there, which hardly seems possible. And as time passes the memories fade, little by little. At first names are fuzzy, and then events are forgotten (until someone says,
"Remember when . . . " and my memory is jogged just a little). How I long to return to that time. I wish I could do some things differently, but I also wish I could again be the person I was, experiencing the things I experienced. What a blessing a mission was for me!
(Here I just have to say, I wish I had my pictures on CD--because all I'm left with are a bunch of random pictures compiled by the APs. And not a single picture of just the Tops among them. You can see them hidden in this picture.)
The cause of these reflections? My mission president and his wife, the Tops, had their homecoming today. And they invited all their missionaries to come (there were definitely a lot of missionaries that came!). It was interesting to see all these people I served with in a similar setting to the one in which I saw them on the mission--in a chapel or church foyer--and yet to realize that what we're all doing now is so different than that which we were doing before. I met wives and fiances (interestingly enough, no husbands--those sisters must all be out of state), and I just wanted to tell some of these girls how absolutely lucky they were. But I'm sure they probably already know that. It was interesting to see missionaries that I didn't serve with and realize that the work is still going on, even though I'm home!
I was going to say a word or two about my mission president and his wife, but I really don't think I can do them justice. I can think of a few words to describe them though: powerful teachers, humble, diligent, witty, patient, loving, and oh so much more! I wish I could figure out how to put audio on my blog because one of the elders from my mission wrote his own words to "You're the Tops" and recorded it. It's hilarious--and fitting.
Hope you don't mind my random train of thought here. But I write what I'm thinking about, and this is definitely what I've been thinking about today!
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
Nothing new
Life is much the same as usual. So I don't know why I'm posting. Perhaps I'm searching for a way to reach the outside world as I sit cooped up in a practice room. I think I will write as if we are having a phone conversation, and, as most of my phone conversations go, I will proceed to tell you random facts about my day-to-day.
I have decided to ban myself from TV. What a distraction that can be! Entertaining as "What Not to Wear" is, I don't think it's the best use of my time.
I spent the weekend in Las Vegas because I had a companion get married--always nice to have an excuse to go to Vegas. We (we being myself and another sister from my mission) stayed with Ryan and Amy Fitzgibbons. It was lovely. I love those folks a whole lot! We spent some time learning what a distraction the Wii can be. If you haven't discovered it yet, it's best to just stay away. Lucky for me, I'm horrible at video games so the fact that I consistently lose keeps me far from them most of the time. The highlight of the trip (besides being with some of my favorite people, of course), was watching the Bellagio fountains, or water-show, or whatever it's called. Every time I've been to Vegas I've tried to go. And believe it or not, every other time I've been it's been too windy so they've cancelled it. But not this trip! If you haven't been it's pretty spectacular. I wouldn't say it's worth a trip down to Vegas, but if you're already going to be there, you should definitely go.
I have nothing else to share. Short conversation, though I suppose if we were really talking on the phone it might have been a little bit longer. After all, I do try and act interested in other people's lives, even though I spend most of the time talking about mine. Yeah, trying to work on not being so selfish too. So much to do.
I have decided to ban myself from TV. What a distraction that can be! Entertaining as "What Not to Wear" is, I don't think it's the best use of my time.
I spent the weekend in Las Vegas because I had a companion get married--always nice to have an excuse to go to Vegas. We (we being myself and another sister from my mission) stayed with Ryan and Amy Fitzgibbons. It was lovely. I love those folks a whole lot! We spent some time learning what a distraction the Wii can be. If you haven't discovered it yet, it's best to just stay away. Lucky for me, I'm horrible at video games so the fact that I consistently lose keeps me far from them most of the time. The highlight of the trip (besides being with some of my favorite people, of course), was watching the Bellagio fountains, or water-show, or whatever it's called. Every time I've been to Vegas I've tried to go. And believe it or not, every other time I've been it's been too windy so they've cancelled it. But not this trip! If you haven't been it's pretty spectacular. I wouldn't say it's worth a trip down to Vegas, but if you're already going to be there, you should definitely go.
I have nothing else to share. Short conversation, though I suppose if we were really talking on the phone it might have been a little bit longer. After all, I do try and act interested in other people's lives, even though I spend most of the time talking about mine. Yeah, trying to work on not being so selfish too. So much to do.
Sunday, July 29, 2007
I want to run away
Why is it that new social situations terrify me! I do fine talking to one or two people. For example, this afternoon my roommates and I chatted for quite a bit, something I had not really done with them until today. But they invited over a bunch of people for games (so far only girls have shown up) and I am absolutely terrified to go in there. How silly is that! I am NOT a shy person. I ALWAYS talk way too much. But I don't know them, and that scares me! But I want you all to know that right after I post this I am going to march in there and smile and try and learn people's names. Wish me luck.
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Sunscreen please!
On Thursday I took some of my nieces and nephews to Seven Peaks waterpark. When I went to pick up the kids, my sister hooked me up with a variety of great sunscreens (including one for your face that's SPF 70 with helioplex. I'm not sure what helioplex is but apparently it's the great new thing!). She even offered to do my back for me, but I declined and was just going to do it once I got there. Dumb Heather, dumb!
True to my word, I finished applying my sunscreen at Seven Peaks. I even got my ears and the tops of my feet. We spent a fun couple of hours in the water. It was a great time! Didn't feel worried about sunburn one bit.
Oh, but sunburnt I was. I noticed it immediately as I got out of the shower. The tops and backs of my shoulders were bright red! Apparently, my long arms didn't quite reach there. Well, a few sleepless nights later I'm here to admonish you to PLEASE, oh please wear your sunscreen. Put it on in front of a mirror so you know you're getting everywhere. It's just not worth it. We're at high risk in my family for skin cancer, and that's just a scary, scary thing.
If you're fair-skinned, blonde or a red-head, have blue eyes (green eyes too maybe), and especially if you have a history of skin cancer in your family, don't be dumb like me. I also heard recently that girls' legs are a danger spot because when you shave you take off a protective layer of skin exposing more delicate skin. If they're scary white like mine, keep them scary white. Ok? Let's all be in this together!
True to my word, I finished applying my sunscreen at Seven Peaks. I even got my ears and the tops of my feet. We spent a fun couple of hours in the water. It was a great time! Didn't feel worried about sunburn one bit.
Oh, but sunburnt I was. I noticed it immediately as I got out of the shower. The tops and backs of my shoulders were bright red! Apparently, my long arms didn't quite reach there. Well, a few sleepless nights later I'm here to admonish you to PLEASE, oh please wear your sunscreen. Put it on in front of a mirror so you know you're getting everywhere. It's just not worth it. We're at high risk in my family for skin cancer, and that's just a scary, scary thing.
If you're fair-skinned, blonde or a red-head, have blue eyes (green eyes too maybe), and especially if you have a history of skin cancer in your family, don't be dumb like me. I also heard recently that girls' legs are a danger spot because when you shave you take off a protective layer of skin exposing more delicate skin. If they're scary white like mine, keep them scary white. Ok? Let's all be in this together!
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Good book
I just finished reading The Screwtape Letters for the second time in my life. The first time I was in junior high--yeah, definitely think the majority of it went right over my head. But now, with a few more years of education behind me, I thoroughly enjoyed my read-through of this C.S. Lewis masterpiece. Ok, perhaps "enjoyed" is the wrong word. Perhaps more fitting words to describe it are astounding, disturbing, and eye-opening.The book is comprised of letters from Screwtape (a powerful devil) to his novice nephew. He advises him on how to best lure his nephew's subject subtly toward hell. Sounds really uplifting, doesn't it! However, there are a few passages that are really beautiful (in a twisted, devil-composed way) and expose the grandeur of our Heavenly Father's plan for us. Such as:
"One must face the fact that all the talk about His love for men, and His service being perfect freedom, is not (as one would gladly believe) mere propaganda, but an appalling truth. He really does want to fill the universe with a lot of loathsome little replicas of Himself—creatures whose life, on its miniature scale, will be qualitatively like His own, not because He has absorbed them but because their wills freely conform to His. . . He wants servants who can finally become sons. . . We are empty and would be filled; He is full and flows over."
I don't know how that makes you feel, but I think it's empowering. Anyway, I guess my whole point for this blog is, You Should Read This Book!
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Oh decisions, decisions
When I have decisions to make, I become completely immobilized, whether they be big or small. Can anyone else relate? Instead of going forth and doing the tasks I know I need to be doing and hoping--no, trusting--that everything else will fall into place, I sit around and search the internet, hoping to find answers, or read old journal entries, or . . . clean. Instead of clearing my mind, praying, and allowing the Spirit to prompt me, I go through every single option and make the decision 10 times harder than it needs to be. Why do I do this to myself? I bet most of these things will work themselves out over time, but I get restless if I don't have the answer RIGHT NOW.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Now that I'm home . . .
I have no exciting topic for this blog. Just thought I would give a little update of my goings-on. So first of all, I am home from NOI! It is nice to be home (especially since there's no mold in my house and I am therefore not sick anymore!) but I sort of miss all of my new friends. Most of them I will probably not stay in touch with (despite the fact that we are facebook friends) and that makes me sad. It's interesting how much you come to care about people that you don't even really know that well. I think it has to do with going through an experience together. They're not people I met at a party, and had one interesting conversation with. They're people I spent a month making music with! That certainly creates a bond.
With some cellists after a concert
With my friend Katie who goes to the U of U--I didn't know her before, but we'll certainly see more of each other now
At lunch with Katie, Yuko, and Cara--they were roommates
Preparing tea bags to put on Katie's eyes. It helps remove eye infections! Just brew tea (not herbal tea--the real stuff) and put the tea bag directly on the eye. It works--I've done it before too!
With my stand partner Karel (pronounced Karl) who is absolutely hilarious
With my main buddies during intermission.
Now I am faced with the dilemma of how to organize the rest of my summer break. I have music to learn (music for recitals, music for orchestra auditions, music for doctoral auditions), a paper to write, students to teach, and along with that, I need to become a more organized, more effective teacher. In addition to all that, I have friends I want to see, family I want to spend time with, and many, many books I want to read. I'm so afraid that I'm going to wake up tomorrow and summer will be over. Isn't that how it usually happens?
With some cellists after a concert
With my friend Katie who goes to the U of U--I didn't know her before, but we'll certainly see more of each other now
At lunch with Katie, Yuko, and Cara--they were roommates
Preparing tea bags to put on Katie's eyes. It helps remove eye infections! Just brew tea (not herbal tea--the real stuff) and put the tea bag directly on the eye. It works--I've done it before too!
With my stand partner Karel (pronounced Karl) who is absolutely hilarious
With my main buddies during intermission.
Now I am faced with the dilemma of how to organize the rest of my summer break. I have music to learn (music for recitals, music for orchestra auditions, music for doctoral auditions), a paper to write, students to teach, and along with that, I need to become a more organized, more effective teacher. In addition to all that, I have friends I want to see, family I want to spend time with, and many, many books I want to read. I'm so afraid that I'm going to wake up tomorrow and summer will be over. Isn't that how it usually happens?
Saturday, June 30, 2007
Cougar Pride
I've never thought of myself as having much school spirit. Sure, I like going to BYU, but mostly because of all the friends I've met there. But during the last couple of weeks I've developed a great sense of pride for my alma mater.
Reason #1: The Honor Code.
Five minutes ago I was standing in our "living room" (it's more like an entryway with couches) combing through my wet hair, in my pajamas I should add. I hear a door open and expect to see either Kim or Lee-Wen walk by. Instead, the reflection I see in the mirror is masculine. What do you say to a boy who comes out of your roommate's bedroom at 9:30 in the morning? I said nothing. Now, I don't know that he did anything more than sleep on her floor, but still! I don't like having boys in my roommates' bedrooms, and I especially don't like them walking by me while I'm combing my hair. At least he didn't come out when I was walking from the bathroom to my bedroom in a towel!
Reason #2: Student employees.
I suppose that working at the Cougareat is not the most glamorous of jobs, but the people that work there don't seem to mind. They smile at you as you order your salad, telling them very specifically that you only want a little bit of chicken, and ask them to pick out the wilted spinach leaves, and woah, could you go light on the dressing. Here, however, most of the workers are NOT students, and not to bash them (after all, I did just write a post about how great people are, and I still think that) but they're not very efficient, and they certainly are not happy doing what they're doing. I somehow don't enjoy a sandwich as much when it's been given to me with a grunt and a glare.
Reason #3: Our mascot.
Our mascot is a Cougar. Their mascot is a Terrapin (in other words, a turtle). Need I say more?
Reason #1: The Honor Code.
Five minutes ago I was standing in our "living room" (it's more like an entryway with couches) combing through my wet hair, in my pajamas I should add. I hear a door open and expect to see either Kim or Lee-Wen walk by. Instead, the reflection I see in the mirror is masculine. What do you say to a boy who comes out of your roommate's bedroom at 9:30 in the morning? I said nothing. Now, I don't know that he did anything more than sleep on her floor, but still! I don't like having boys in my roommates' bedrooms, and I especially don't like them walking by me while I'm combing my hair. At least he didn't come out when I was walking from the bathroom to my bedroom in a towel!
Reason #2: Student employees.
I suppose that working at the Cougareat is not the most glamorous of jobs, but the people that work there don't seem to mind. They smile at you as you order your salad, telling them very specifically that you only want a little bit of chicken, and ask them to pick out the wilted spinach leaves, and woah, could you go light on the dressing. Here, however, most of the workers are NOT students, and not to bash them (after all, I did just write a post about how great people are, and I still think that) but they're not very efficient, and they certainly are not happy doing what they're doing. I somehow don't enjoy a sandwich as much when it's been given to me with a grunt and a glare.
Reason #3: Our mascot.
Our mascot is a Cougar. Their mascot is a Terrapin (in other words, a turtle). Need I say more?
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
On bathrooms
The University of Maryland has a beautiful campus, and they work hard to care for it and keep it clean. It's an old campus, but they keep their facilities updated. For example, many of the bathrooms have high-tech features, such as automatic soap, automatic paper-towels, and automatic flushing toilets (maybe instead of "automatic" the correct term would be "motion-activated"?).
This is all very nice.
However to me the point of having automatic/motion-activated devices in bathrooms is to avoid the spreading of germs. If you have an automatic soap dispenser but no automatic water or paper towels (such as the bathroom by the concert hall), then you're recontaminating your hands. And if you have automatic flushing toilets but nothing else, well that didn't do you any good, did it? To me, the ideal is a bathroom with automatic everything--well, I could do without the soap actually.
Funny that I'm thinking about this so much. I'm actually not really one of those people that's paranoid about germs. I don't even open the bathroom door with a paper towel. I use my just-washed hands. I just think these bathrooms here are funny.
That's all.
This is all very nice.
However to me the point of having automatic/motion-activated devices in bathrooms is to avoid the spreading of germs. If you have an automatic soap dispenser but no automatic water or paper towels (such as the bathroom by the concert hall), then you're recontaminating your hands. And if you have automatic flushing toilets but nothing else, well that didn't do you any good, did it? To me, the ideal is a bathroom with automatic everything--well, I could do without the soap actually.
Funny that I'm thinking about this so much. I'm actually not really one of those people that's paranoid about germs. I don't even open the bathroom door with a paper towel. I use my just-washed hands. I just think these bathrooms here are funny.
That's all.
Friday, June 22, 2007
People
I'm taking the advice recently given by Jeanine and just writing. That's my disclaimer for this post.
I've been musing (can I say that?) about how interesting people are and especially my view of them. I find myself forming opinions of people rather quickly. And then I seem to change my opinions just as quickly once I get to know them. I think my opinions are often based on superficial things such as:
the way people look (pretty, plain, black, white, foreign, male, female, long hair, short hair, dyed hair, red hair, happy, depressed, shy)
what people wear (tight clothes, baggy clothes, trendy clothes, unflattering clothes, chic clothes, sporty clothes, body piercings, tattoos, makeup, jewelry, flip-flops, high-heels, skater shoes)
what comes out of their mouths ("hi", laughter, cuss words, complaints, high voice, sweet voice, loud voice)
and what I see people doing (talking, hugging, flirting, pondering, studying, practicing, reading, smoking, drinking, fellowshipping, smiling, frowning).
I think there's more to people than all that. I know as a missionary I felt like I truly saw people, but I sometimes forget. I know I don't want people to judge me based solely on these things. When I'm sick and grumpy, I hope people know that I'm just sick and grumpy. When I'm complaining or criticizing, I want them to know that in my heart I really love people and I often express more than I feel. In other words, I want people to give me the benefit of the doubt, but do I reciprocate?
People are amazing! Every once in a while I catch a glimpse of the divinity that is in all people. We all have different backgrounds, values, strengths and weaknesses. But I'm realizing more and more that despite our differences, there is good to be seen in everyone and we can learn from everyone around us. For instance, here at NOI (National Orchestral Institute):
there's Margo, my roommate--plays cello; strong family values; going to teach in New York; has a beautiful smile; kind to everyone.
there's Nick, the concertmaster--from Pennsylvania; introduced himself to me when I was being shy; always looks happy; seems to be friends with everyone.
there's Hyun Ji--a cellist from Korea; always asks how I'm doing and tells me I look pretty; turns out she's married and has a little son.
there's Kate--plays bass; always has a fun time; smiles at me from across the orchestra.
there's . . . a million more people. Each with their own story, their own set of details, things that I'll never know, no matter how hard I try to get to know them. And they each have potential that I can't even begin to comprehend. How can I get offended if they say something mean? How can I criticize them if they do something different than I would? How can I help but love them?
There's a quote (a very fragmented quote--I apologize) from C.S. Lewis that I love. "He said (in the Bible) that we were ‘gods’ and He is going to make good His words. If we let Him . . . He will make the feeblest and filthiest of us into a god or goddess, dazzling, radiant, immortal creature, . . . a bright stainless mirror which reflects back to God perfectly . . . His own boundless power and delight and goodness."
Even as I've had these profound realizations about people, I find myself still judging them, criticizing them, being offended by them. But I don't want to! I want to live by the admonition found in 1 John 4:7&12: "Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of god . . . If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us."
That's what it's really all about, isn't it?
I've been musing (can I say that?) about how interesting people are and especially my view of them. I find myself forming opinions of people rather quickly. And then I seem to change my opinions just as quickly once I get to know them. I think my opinions are often based on superficial things such as:
the way people look (pretty, plain, black, white, foreign, male, female, long hair, short hair, dyed hair, red hair, happy, depressed, shy)
what people wear (tight clothes, baggy clothes, trendy clothes, unflattering clothes, chic clothes, sporty clothes, body piercings, tattoos, makeup, jewelry, flip-flops, high-heels, skater shoes)
what comes out of their mouths ("hi", laughter, cuss words, complaints, high voice, sweet voice, loud voice)
and what I see people doing (talking, hugging, flirting, pondering, studying, practicing, reading, smoking, drinking, fellowshipping, smiling, frowning).
I think there's more to people than all that. I know as a missionary I felt like I truly saw people, but I sometimes forget. I know I don't want people to judge me based solely on these things. When I'm sick and grumpy, I hope people know that I'm just sick and grumpy. When I'm complaining or criticizing, I want them to know that in my heart I really love people and I often express more than I feel. In other words, I want people to give me the benefit of the doubt, but do I reciprocate?
People are amazing! Every once in a while I catch a glimpse of the divinity that is in all people. We all have different backgrounds, values, strengths and weaknesses. But I'm realizing more and more that despite our differences, there is good to be seen in everyone and we can learn from everyone around us. For instance, here at NOI (National Orchestral Institute):
there's Margo, my roommate--plays cello; strong family values; going to teach in New York; has a beautiful smile; kind to everyone.
there's Nick, the concertmaster--from Pennsylvania; introduced himself to me when I was being shy; always looks happy; seems to be friends with everyone.
there's Hyun Ji--a cellist from Korea; always asks how I'm doing and tells me I look pretty; turns out she's married and has a little son.
there's Kate--plays bass; always has a fun time; smiles at me from across the orchestra.
there's . . . a million more people. Each with their own story, their own set of details, things that I'll never know, no matter how hard I try to get to know them. And they each have potential that I can't even begin to comprehend. How can I get offended if they say something mean? How can I criticize them if they do something different than I would? How can I help but love them?
There's a quote (a very fragmented quote--I apologize) from C.S. Lewis that I love. "He said (in the Bible) that we were ‘gods’ and He is going to make good His words. If we let Him . . . He will make the feeblest and filthiest of us into a god or goddess, dazzling, radiant, immortal creature, . . . a bright stainless mirror which reflects back to God perfectly . . . His own boundless power and delight and goodness."
Even as I've had these profound realizations about people, I find myself still judging them, criticizing them, being offended by them. But I don't want to! I want to live by the admonition found in 1 John 4:7&12: "Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of god . . . If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and his love is perfected in us."
That's what it's really all about, isn't it?
Thursday, June 21, 2007
A Grand Substitute
1. Play the violin . . . check
2. Don't exercise enough . . . check
3. High-stress personality . . . check
Put together, these equal someone with chronic back and shoulder pain. Well, maybe that's a little dramatic. But I have had my fair share of bowling ball-size knots in my shoulders over the years. Unfortunately I'm not quite in a financial situation to have a personal massage therapist follow me around all the time. Lucky for me, I just discovered a cheap alternative. A tennis ball! (Now this is the part that was supposed to have a cute little image of a tennis ball. I haven't quite figured out how to do that yet though.)
For any who want to try it out, I just place the ball on the tight area, lean against the wall, move around a little (it looks ridiculous, so you may not want to do it in public) and . . . oh man. It works wonders! I tried it on the floor but didn't like it as well. So don't go blow your Christmas money on those electronic massage tools that hardly work. This is super portable too! I also recall golf balls working for the arches in my feet. Definitely going to have to stop by a sports store soon.
2. Don't exercise enough . . . check
3. High-stress personality . . . check
Put together, these equal someone with chronic back and shoulder pain. Well, maybe that's a little dramatic. But I have had my fair share of bowling ball-size knots in my shoulders over the years. Unfortunately I'm not quite in a financial situation to have a personal massage therapist follow me around all the time. Lucky for me, I just discovered a cheap alternative. A tennis ball! (Now this is the part that was supposed to have a cute little image of a tennis ball. I haven't quite figured out how to do that yet though.)
For any who want to try it out, I just place the ball on the tight area, lean against the wall, move around a little (it looks ridiculous, so you may not want to do it in public) and . . . oh man. It works wonders! I tried it on the floor but didn't like it as well. So don't go blow your Christmas money on those electronic massage tools that hardly work. This is super portable too! I also recall golf balls working for the arches in my feet. Definitely going to have to stop by a sports store soon.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Laugh a little!
Question: Is it just me, or do you think that people in general take themselves way too seriously? I know I fall into that category sometimes, but why do we do that to ourselves? Life is fun, hilarious, happy, sometimes sad, but I'm starting to believe that it should never, ever be so serious. I think we miss out on so much when we're so worried about things that we can't laugh at ourselves.
What's causing these reflections, you ask? Oh, just being around so many musicians for 2 weeks. Maybe I'm off-base, but when I screw up (which happens frequently) I smile, or I sometimes laugh. I don't see a point in sitting through rehearsal with a straight face, making sure I scowl everytime something goes wrong. Maybe I was like that at some point, but no more. Life is too short. I'm here to have fun!
What's causing these reflections, you ask? Oh, just being around so many musicians for 2 weeks. Maybe I'm off-base, but when I screw up (which happens frequently) I smile, or I sometimes laugh. I don't see a point in sitting through rehearsal with a straight face, making sure I scowl everytime something goes wrong. Maybe I was like that at some point, but no more. Life is too short. I'm here to have fun!
Sunday, June 17, 2007
What am I doing here?
Well here I am--the blogging world. I don't know that I have much to say--and even more than that, I don't know how any of this works (and I'm supposed to be part of that generation that understands technology. Maybe it skips a generation . . . or two). But even though I enjoy reading my friends blogs and check them EVERY DAY, and even though I feel like what I have to write is far less interesting than all of you, I guess I feel just a little left out. So I guess I will "join the others."
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